Thank you so much for the Monday Funnies, Story Reading Ape. What would we do without them? I love to spread the smiles as often as I can.
Many of you have recently received emails from Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) announcing that Amazon is changing file requirements for KDP ebooks. As often happens with change, there is some confusion about how this will change how authors and publishers will upload their ebooks to KDP leading to questions and concerns.
“After June 28, 2021, we will no longer support MOBI files when publishing new or updating previously published reflowable ebooks. Instead, use EPUB, DOCX or KPF formats, see our Frequently Asked Questions for more information. MOBI files are still accepted for fixed-layout ebooks.”
What Does That Mean, Exactly?
Thank you, Andre Clayton for a great blog post about naming our fictional characters. We all have been there. And for all of us it’s always interesting to find out how other authors are doing it!
on The Write Life:
When you start writing your story, how long does it take you to come up with character names?
Choosing the perfect name for your protagonist and antagonist can take ages, especially when you’re not sure how to start.
I’ve been there. After wasting days staring at a blank computer screen, attempting to come up with names for all of my characters, I developed with some helpful naming strategies. And I’d like to share them with you!
on Just Publishing Advice:
If you are a new author, you have plenty of choices of free self-publishing companies to publish your book.
It is very easy to publish an ebook today and make it available to the world.
You can also publish a paperback book using print-on-demand services.
There’s nothing to stop you from publishing your new book, and yes, you can do it for free.
In This Article15 Free self-publishing companies, you can choose
The best choices for ebooks
.1. Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP)
2. Apple Books
3. Barnes & Noble Press
4. Kobo Writing Life
Free paperback self-publishing
10. Amazon KDP
15. Barnes & Noble Press.
Thank you so much for the giggles, Sally! I’m trying to spread the smiles. These are so funny!
Welcome to laughter lines. We will be sharing some of our favourites from the archives over the next few weeks.
Check out Debby’s column here on SmorgasbordD.G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships 2020
Now something from Sally. Wry Writing Humour
A writer comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is standing outside. “What happened, honey?” the man asks.
“Oh, John, it was terrible,” she weeps. “I was cooking, the phone rang. It was your agent. Because I was on the phone, I didn’t notice the stove was on fire. It went up in second. Everything is gone. I nearly didn’t make it out of the house. Poor Fluffy is–”
View original post 143 more words
Deborah Grant-Dudley informs us about the review rules on Amazon. It is hard to get reviews on Amazon, particularly for us Indie Authors. Deborah tells us why. Thank you very much.
How to avoid having your book review deleted
Indie authors rely on book reviews to help sell their books. But Amazon are notoriously strict about reviews. They frequently decline new reviews and delete existing reviews. If you want to help an indie author, it’s important to stay in Amazon’s good books. Yes, I went there!
Here’s a handy guide to writing reviews that will be accepted. Be aware other bookstores have their own guidelines. I’ve focused on Amazon as they are the biggest bookseller, and they sell lots of indie books.
Check you allowed to review the book
Amazon has a minimum spend threshold you must meet before you can leave a review. Currently, that’s £40 in the UK and $50 in the US. You must have spent at least that amount in the past 12 months. If you meet this criteria, you can review a book on their website.
Fashion. It sounds frivolous, but it has serious effects on us all.
Right now, women are getting beard-burn from kissing men who sport the fashionable romantic-hero three-day stubble. And mothers are stifling their disappointment when their golden-haired boys get the fashion-victim shaved-sides hairdo that makes them look like a cross between Kim Jong Un and the Last of the Mohicans.
And have pity on the people over 40 who are hunched over their computers trying to decipher text from the latest fashion in web design: a tiny, palest-gray font on a white background.
Alas, fashion favors the young.
Writing fashion is hard on us too. Fashion dictates a good deal of what gets published these days, and it’s constantly changing. Write like Thackery, Kipling, or Walter Scott and you’re unlikely to find a publisher or an audience. That’s because writing fashions have radically changed in the last two hundred years, even though the language itself has not.
The truth is that a great many of the “rules” that writers learn in workshops, critique groups, and classes are not actual rules of the English language. They may not even represent correct grammar. But they’re the “way we do things now.”
In other words: They’re what’s in fashion.
Thank you so much, Kristen Lamb, for another educational blog post on how to write stories properly and keep the reader interested. We all appreciate your hard work!
Change is one of those concepts that gets a mixed reaction. Depending on personality and/or age group, change could be welcomed…or greeted with a metaphorical shotgun at the metaphorical door. While change is necessary for all living things to grow and thrive, plants have proven far more open to this notion than people.
I’m betting it’s because plants don’t overthink everything…unless they’re orchids which are high-maintenance and die while writing bad haiku (if they had hands and pen and paper).
Existential plants have a far tougher time, unlike weeds. Weeds just roll with anything that comes their way, and that’s why we can pour concrete over them and it’s no big deal. They simply mumble to the nearby crabgrass, “Hold my beer and watch this!”
*makes crack in new driveway* I’M BAAAAAACK!
All kidding aside, many writers miss the point of a story. Stories are about change, and the more the protagonist (and, to be blunt, all members of the cast) change for good or bad, the better.
Change & Plot
I know what it’s like to have writer brain. We see the world VERY differently than ‘normal’ people. Some see a roll of old carpet at the curb? I’m counting if all family members are present. Just yesterday, I had some fun over on Facebook with this…