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How do we describe pain? Pain can have many different ‘forms’ of manifestation: I found the following words:

  • ache
  • pang
  • prick
  • shoot
  • smart
  • sting
  • stitch
  • throw
  • tingle
  • twinge
  • Burning
  • Sharp
  • Aching
  • Dull
  • Stabbing
  • Radiating
  • Throbbing
  • Cramping
  • Shooting

There are probably many more words to describe pain… in most cases, we describe what aches us when we are experiencing a headache, a tummy ache, when we fell and got injured, when our head, our knee, or our hand hurts when we cut or pricked ourselves…

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But… where is the table to describe the pain of heartbreak? Nagging, crushing, piercing…? We heard it all. But nobody can really invent, or find new words to really express what a human being with a broken heart feels. It’s too much to describe, or there are no words? That probably is most accurate, or, as I said once: “The pain of a broken heart is despair.”

Now, a broken heart is caused by loss… generally the loss of a beloved human being, maybe even a pet… The loss of a human being can be caused by separation by decision, or by death.

In medical terms, it’s called ‘Broken Heart Syndrome’, BHS. I have published a blog post about it, you can find it here.

How to describe what you feel? How to tell your doctor, your psychiatrist, or your best friend, what your tears mean? Tears can’t mend your heart, they are just a manifestation of the words you can’t speak aloud.

How to describe, when nothing you feel makes sense? How to describe the patience you needed to be with someone, how to describe the joy you felt when even talking to the person? How to describe the loss you felt, after saying good night over the phone, and how to describe the endless hours of missing someone’s voice, even if it doesn’t really make sense?

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Do you have experience describing broken heart pain? Help us out, we would like to know. It’s horrible, not to know what we feel, or how to express it.

8 thoughts on “Pain…

  1. Now being quite ancient, I have, quite naturally, been buffeted by life and experienced the high and lows, from a scraped knee as a child and the brief pain; the deeper (hurt pride) of losing a would be suitor to a close…friend, to the almost unbearable heart-break of losing a young brother, and even worse, a beloved mother, and several close friends. None are given a ‘hand-book to life’ when born and most – like being at sea – are buffeted by the ebb and flow of numbness, belief, disbelief and the agony of losing loved ones. To survive (and many fall and are lost), the only option is to carry the burden of pain in our hearts, but also the love and good memories of those we lose. Personally, despite all, I have been blessed with a loving family, when young and now, which makes a world of difference, so court and treasure all the joys of living when you can. Remember, you are unique, as are we all. Hugs, love and hope are ‘everything.’ xxx

    Liked by 2 people

  2. The only way I know to describe the kind of heartbreak and pain you are talking about here is this: “Tears too deep to cry.” The hurt goes so deep that even crying brings no relief.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. During the course of anyone’s life, this type of pain is bound to occur. Some of the younger generation may not have had it happen yet, but they will. It is from loss, whether of a person you love in death or because they walked away. I’d describe the pain as a homesickness. If you loved that person, they were like home to you. Most of us have felt homesick at one time or another as well. It’s that gnawing sensation deep in your stomach and heart. Sometimes, it comes with tears, sometimes not. It can go on and on so that you can find no relief, sleep, appetite, or anything else to help. When I experienced it, the only thing that helped was to keep busy so you didn’t think about the pain. And I found relief in prayer… lots of prayer. Hope that helps.

    Liked by 1 person

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