Another great post by our favorite humorous educating blogger, Kristen Lamb. Thanks so much for all you teach us, Kristen!
Evil fascinates us, and has since the dawn of human consciousness. I continually emphasize that humans are story creatures, which is good news for writers, since we’re in the story business.
Though not all stories face off evil directly, all stories must include conflict to be considered a story. Conflict isn’t, per se, evil, but great storytellers paint with words and black is only the farthest extreme. Some stories might demand a LOT of black, but others will likely run along the spectrum of “evil.”
No, the department’s budget cuts that force your MC (Main Character) to lay off twenty hardworking people she cares about isn’t, per se, evil at work, but maybe it is. For your MC? It sure feels close to it in the moment. Especially when the cowards higher up force her to wield the ax hand out the pink slips…a week before Christmas.
My birth name is „Ethel“. This is, as I was told, an old English girl’s name, some independent form of “Ethelred.” That would be fine with me if I weren’t male! I figure my name was sort of an expression of Lucifer’s askew humor. At least he most of the time convulses with laughter when calling me.
As compared to what humans think demons are not only made, they’re born as well. I am, in fact, the living prove that I’m telling the truth.
My father and mother, Braxxus and Persophee, some “mediocre” distractors (demons who confuse human senses to tempt them doing evil) met during some hellish fire party and fell in love. That’s what they told me, even though I strongly suspect they were more physically attracted to each other than anything else. From that moment on, they copulated as often as they could. From what Persophee said, I am their “love bundle.” I’d rather say, the result of this more than equivocal mating became me.
Unfortunately, these two demons had a bet going with Lucifer and lost. As consequence, I was compelled to serve as the footman of a minion, of the minion of the minion of Lucifer’s master demon. Since Lucifer found me and the bet so hilarious, he often used me as his personal doormat and had tons of fun with that.
He thought it fascinating that I looked more human than anyone else in Hell. Both of my producers had scales and horns and except the somehow unexpected wiry hair that was standing up on my head and nearly looked like goat horns I had nothing demonic on me. When I was sent to Earth the first time, I could do so without the need of being changed. People shied away from me eventually because I seemed to smell weird, but after a few hours of bathing and a couple proper clothes I almost felt human and was accepted as one. That first time I discovered the beauty in this new world. I saw flowers, trees, green grass and ponds, parks, zoos and watched birds, cats and dogs…
To me, it was almost painful to sow evil amongst mankind. I hesitated to do what I was sent to do and this annoyed the Master of all Evil. He ordered me back and punished me painfully.
That day I decided I had enough. I know, my kind normally enjoys wallowing in anger, rage, crime, pain, depression and murder. But I was sick of it. I felt like drowning in greed, bullying, sins, and blood. I did not want that anymore and decided to get out. Of course, it isn’t exactly easy to change sides. But the thought of existing within evilness was unthinkable to me.
Finally, Lucifer helped me unintentionally by promoting me to become a distractor. He turned me into an extraordinarily handsome man to make it easier for me to tempt humans by being attractive to them. Additionally, to complete my physiognomy he re-named me “Jesse”, the “Gift-giver”. He nearly wet himself of laughter, explaining, that I indeed brought gifts to mankind: the gift of sin.
In my opinion, he got me closer to what I wanted. Of course, I need to be careful now. Guardian Angels don’t know mercy! But since I am here, on Earth, it is time to take action to free me…
During my later childhood and teenager time it turned out I would develop a highly sensitive as well as melancholy personality.
Facing problems, getting in trouble, seeing injustice or people needing my compassion made me very sad, even angry. I cried more often than was good for me.
In the meantime I learned to control my emotions on a different level. It doesn’t mean things like this don’t touch me anymore. It is just easier for me to get along with them; it as well means than I am helpful and caring – and therefore too often used by people.
Not everything in my life went smoothly and too often I faced trouble or problems. When solutions for them are found, I work on it – and what’s done is gone.
But I have to admit, if a person does anything bad, hurts me, uses me, humiliates me or is just downright evil I will keep that in mind.
It doesn’t mean I can’t forgive. In fact I could, but even if I forgive – I will never forget.
As many other people I had to learn how to handle the past to leave it behind me and concentrate on the future. This was a painful lesson.
I had a coach supporting me with this task and I still am grateful for all the efforts he was going through.
And one day he handed me a little picture with the quote of Lao Tzu:
If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present. Lao Tzu
I will never forget. In fact I still have that little card with the quote, even though old and ragged, I’m convinced it will stay with me until it will dissolve.
This is a quote necessary to shake me and my mind awake because we were heading into the wrong direction.
Thank you for all you have done for me, Mr. E. S. B. God bless you.