You have been warned

Thanks so much for making us laugh with these pics, Bluebird of Bitterness. I had a fun time, giggling away the entire time scrolling down.

bluebird of bitterness

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Time for some laffs – Driving Grandmothers, mechanical cows and inflight service!

Thank you for this wonderful humor, Sally. I had so much fun! ūüėÄ

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

A visit to the archives from 2015 for some recyclables… so to speak.

Got a letter from Grandma the other day. She writes:

The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a ‚ÄúHonk if you love Jesus‚ÄĚ bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

Boy, I’m glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed!

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is, and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed. I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!

Why, while I…

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Smorgasbord – Time for some Laffs – Out of the mouths of babes!

Thanks so much for sharing this wonderful humorous post with us. ūüôā

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

laffsMy thanks to my lovely friend Mrs. T who sent the following laffs to me… I have embellished with some funnies from Facebook in recent months.

child-sleeping

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human, because even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

Little girl: ‚ÄėWhen I get to heaven I will ask Jonah.‚Äô

Teacher: ‚ÄėWhat if Jonah went to hell?‚Äô

Little girl: ‚ÄėThen you ask him.‚Äô

1533862_10151907730223030_1716352393_nA Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She occasionally would walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she…

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Laughter the Best Medicine – Weekend Special – Part Two

Tina Frisco provided Sally Cronin with a number of smiles last week. Thank you so much for permitting me to spread it on my blog. I had a good laugh!

 

tina-frisco

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

The second part of the email that my lovely friend Tina sent me ….Keep laughing….

WHY MEN ARE SELDOM DEPRESSED

Men are just happier people, right? What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One¬†wallet¬†and¬†one¬†pair¬†of¬†shoes¬†‚Ästone¬†color¬†for¬†all¬†seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You¬†can¬†‚Äėdo‚Äô¬†your¬†nails¬†with¬†a¬†pocket¬†knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes.

Is it any wonder men are happier!

NICKNAMES: If Laura, Kate, and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate, and Sarah.·If Mike, Dave, and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba, and Wildman.

EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY: A man will pay $2 for a $1…

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Thursday Funny – Seniors

Thank you, Don Massenzio, for making us all chuckle. These are hilarious!! Definitely worth a share.

Author Don Massenzio

old man hammerIn the hardware store, a ‚Ä®clerk asked, ‚ÄúCan I help you find ‚Ä®anything?‚ÄĚ

‚ÄúHow about my misspent youth,‚ÄĚ joked my husband.

The clerk shot back, ‚ÄúWe keep that in the back, between world peace and winning lottery tickets.‚ÄĚ

bull

A week after John bought a bull, he complained to his friend, ‚ÄúAll that bull does is eat grass. Won‚Äôt even look at a cow.‚ÄĚ

‚ÄúTake him to the vet,‚ÄĚ his friend suggested.

The next week, John is much happier. ‚ÄúThe vet gave him some pills, and the bull serviced all of my cows!‚ÄĚ he told his pal. ‚ÄúThen he broke through the fence and bred with all my neighbor‚Äôs cows! He‚Äôs like a machine!‚ÄĚ

‚ÄúWhat kind of pills were they?‚ÄĚ asked the friend.

‚ÄúI don‚Äôt know, but they‚Äôve got a peppermint taste.‚ÄĚ

bald

Seeing her friend Sally wearing a new locket, Meg asks if there is a memento of some sort inside.

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Laughter the best medicine – I just found a magic lamp!!

Smorgasbord is always providing us with the best humor!! This time it’s the magic lamp smiles! Have fun! LOL

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

imagesA woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie’s lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she was going to receive the usual three wishes.

The Genie said, ‚ÄúNope ‚Ķ due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wages in third-world countries, and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish. So ‚Ķ what‚Äôll it be?‚ÄĚ

The woman didn‚Äôt hesitate. She said, ‚ÄúI want peace in the Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other.‚ÄĚ

The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, ‚ÄúGadzooks, lady! These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I‚Äôm good, but not THAT good! I don‚Äôt think it can be done. Make another wish.‚ÄĚ

The woman thought for a minute and said, “Well, I’ve never been able to find the right…

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