Vampire Maman Juliette Kings informed me today that my humorous short story ‘Bernie Showers In France’ has been published on her blog as her Sunday Short story. Thank you so much for all your support, Juliette!! I’m so proud to have you as a friend!
Have a fun read and a few giggles!!
Bernie Showers in France
A short story by Aurora Jean Alexander
Bernie Watson, a self-acclaimed womanizer, always wanted to see Paris. One day he managed to travel to France after tediously scraping up the money he needed for the trip. In his imagination, Bernie saw himself sitting in the first class, sipping champagne and enjoying movies, a beautiful woman next to him. He was dreaming about standing on the balcony of a 5-star hotel with a breathtaking view over the city until he could see the Eiffel Tower and the Arc de Triomphe from far.
Reality looked a bit different. Bernie found himself in the middle row of economy, helplessly jammed between an angry tourist at the end of his vacation and a permanently eating eighty-year-old on the other side, with an ancient Pekinese on her lap.
When he arrived at the hotel, he found that the two-star hotel he had made reservations, was even older than he had suspected from the pictures. It was located in the most run-down quarter of the city. Bernie now wasn’t the most hygiene-fanatic on Earth, but after a trip of roughly 9 hours in an airplane, he still felt the need to shower.
This is such a funny, true, heartwarming, and caring blog post, I couldn’t resist to re-blog. Thanks for your humor – and your cats, Cary!
To most, a cat owner is often stereotyped as being asocial or a solitudinarian. To these shallow cretins, people with cats are as pestiferous as the agoraphobic, online gamers, and those with an addiction to porn so severe it makes God ashamed for inventing sex organs. But 87% of you who are reading this know the truth: cat owners can be just as social as any average person; therefore, they bear just as much responsibility for preventing the spread of COVID-19 through social distancing as you.
But cat owners have an advantage, a built-in defense against socialization that 74.6% of households lack: the combination of a lap and an entitled cat.
My personal contribution to St. Patrick’s Day. Sharing the St. Patrick’s Funnies from The Story Reading Ape’s blog. Thanks so much for the giggles! 🙂
The Story Reading Ape once again makes us laugh with sharing “Maxine’s” antics. Thanks so much for the giggles!
Thank you very much for the giggles, Sally. I couldn’t resist re-blogging this post and sharing the smiles.
Now for that joke…..Things Kids Say.
After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, “That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys.”
The Sunday School Teacher asked, “Now, Johnny, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?”
“No sir,” Johnny replies, “I don’t have to. My Mom is a good cook.”
A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they were on the way to church service, “Why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”
One bright little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the…
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The Story Reading Ape provides us with ‘Winter Funnies’ – or ‘Snowman Funnies’. Thanks so much for the giggle! 🙂 You’re great, Chris!