Depression and Bipolar Disorder (formerly known as manic-depressive illness) are two distinct mental health conditions, each characterized by unique symptoms and patterns of mood disturbance.
Depression, often referred to as Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), is marked by persistent feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and a lack of interest or pleasure in activities that were once enjoyed. Individuals with depression may also experience changes in appetite or weight, sleep disturbances, fatigue, difficulty concentrating, feelings of worthlessness or guilt, and thoughts of death or suicide. Depression can vary in severity and duration, ranging from mild and temporary episodes to more severe and chronic forms.
On the other hand, Bipolar Disorder involves episodes of both depression and mania or hypomania. Mania is characterized by periods of heightened mood, excessive energy, racing thoughts, increased activity levels, inflated self-esteem or grandiosity, decreased need for sleep, impulsivity, and risky behavior. Hypomania is a less severe form of mania, but still involves elevated mood and increased energy. These manic or hypomanic episodes alternate with periods of depression, during which individuals may experience the same symptoms as those with depression alone.
One key distinction between depression and bipolar disorder is the presence of manic or hypomanic episodes in bipolar disorder. While both conditions involve depressive episodes, bipolar disorder also includes periods of elevated mood and increased energy that are not present in depression alone.
Another important difference lies in the treatment approaches for each condition. Depression is often treated with psychotherapy, medication (such as antidepressants), or a combination of both. Bipolar disorder typically requires mood-stabilizing medications to manage manic or hypomanic episodes, along with medications to address depressive symptoms. Psychotherapy, particularly cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and interpersonal therapy (IPT), can also be beneficial in managing bipolar disorder, often in conjunction with medication.
It’s crucial to seek professional help for an accurate diagnosis and appropriate treatment plan if you or someone you know is experiencing symptoms of depression or bipolar disorder. Both conditions can have a significant impact on daily functioning and quality of life, but with proper management, individuals can lead fulfilling and productive lives.
Sometimes, life doesn’t go according to plan… Mine hasn’t done that for several years, actually. And more than once I found myself in a nearly unbearable situation, no job, no money, everything I built up in danger, and instead of making things better, other people found it obviously hilarious to put a spoke in my wheel, sometimes not only one… my accounts get hacked. Some freaking moron finds it obviously hilarious to steal money I worked really hard for… the respective company does NOTHING to fix things for me. Instead of improving things, it gets worse… the delays are damaging my reputation, my finances, and my life…
“
In a situation like that, someone could easily consider giving up life altogether; it’s not even rare that this happens.
What do we say to someone who has that kind of difficulty to master and obviously suffers from depression?
There are a few things that are easily said and basically mean nothing… except a guaranteed pissed-off depressed person who’s already walking on a very small edge and ready to fall…
Just remember: Advice isn’t the same as asking for help. If they ask for your advice, give it if you so choose. But don’t offer them “helpful” solutions or statements that seem like a cure for their depression. This can feel judgmental or not empathetic.
Don’t say:
“Just think happy thoughts. I don’t understand what you have to be so sad about.”
“Everything will be OK, I promise.”
“I cut out sugar, and I was cured! You should try it.”
“You just need to snap out of this.”
“So many people out there are worse off than you.”
And Healthline.com is right. There are very few people out there I ask for advice and help, and even less I accept it from.
Understanding and empathy is very important to give to someone with depression. Don’t try to offer support if you don’t know what it means to be in that situation.
Depression is the part of you that fills with sadness everywhere that hope leaves a hole in you when it leaves…
~ A. J. Alexander ~
Depression makes it hard to move… sometimes even getting out of bed is a challenge. Don’t try to be helpful by being cheerful, and don’t try to support by being sad and co-suffering. It won’t help at all.
The best things to ask are: “What can I do to help?” or “If you want to talk about it, I’m ready when you are.”
Sometimes, talking about it is helpful… but sometimes, sitting in a corner, watching out the window, and crying does more for the person than words… Don’t offer advice if you can’t help… Occasionally, giving useless suggestions to a depressive person is about as useful as dancing naked in rubber boots down the alleyway.
And on occasion… if you know someone who knows someone who can help… This would be perfect in a very helpful way…
It’s not easy to be friends or related to a person with depression. It’s hard to watch a beloved person turning into a heap of hopelessness, and it’s harder to help the person out of that.
Sometimes, real help is needed. And I’m not talking about a shrink… I’m talking about law enforcement, legal support, financial aid – and a job.
And sometimes, only ice cream can make things better. It might sound trivial… but occasionally, only a banana split stands between your depressive friend and the end.
To a certain degree, it’s a metaphor. (It can be a steak and fries, too) But that’s not what I mean… I mean, it might help your loved one to feel alive, feel the little things that are enjoyable (like the taste of ice cream, hot fudge, and banana exploding on the tongue), but more so, to talk to a person who is interested in the things that make life so hard.
Be that person… be around, available, approachable… be there.
Many of us, suffering from depression on a regular or an irregular basis, experience the so-called ‘Christmas Blues’. Often it is a mixture of different conditions, depression, financial stress, the end of the year and missed achievements, the grief of missing loved ones, loneliness, sadness, and the stress of keeping a smiling face for your surroundings… But is it really only the Christmas Blues?
‘Spectrum Health’ gives us recommendations to beat the ‘Christmas Blues’, or whatever else we might call this annual recurrent sadness:
Here are a few tips for beating the Holiday blues and looking out for loved ones:
Call someone you think maybe struggling or you haven’t heard from in a while;
Do something for your community or your neighbor that might make you feel good;
Find new ways to keep in contact with people you love, like video chat or send a good old fashion snail mail card;
Support someone you know who may be mourning the loss of a loved one and spending their first Christmas without them this year;
Take a few minutes to look around you and find things you are grateful for- this can take just a minute or less;
Open your mind to new traditions;
Take some time to get outside and enjoy the winter beauty.
SAMHSA (The Substance Abuse And Menthal Health Service Administration) gives us a website full of advice:
Strategies for supporting your mental health:
Pay attention to your feelings Remember that it is okay to feel unhappy during the holidays. Recognizing your feelings is the first step to addressing and nurturing them.
Develop a plan for when you are feeling stressed, sad, or lonely This plan may include calling a friend or family member, going for a walk, engaging in an activity that brings joy, or watching a favorite movie. Having a plan ahead of time can help ensure the difficult moments are more manageable.
Practice self-care It is important to schedule time for yourself and activities that recharge your mind and body. This may include reading a good book, working out, spending time in nature, and practicing stress management skills, such as deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness. It is also important to remember to prioritize necessities, including eating a balanced diet, getting plenty of sleep, and finding time for exercise.
Connect with community If you can’t be near loved ones during the holidays, finding a supportive community through clubs, support groups, community centers, local meetups, and faith communities can help reduce feelings of loneliness and isolation. Consider scheduling a regular phone call with family and friends as well.
Support others During this time of year feelings of grief and loss can amplify. Check in on loved ones who may be alone or struggling during the holiday season. Helping a friend or neighbor not only gives joy to others, but it can improve your own happiness and well-being.
Recognize seasonal mood changes Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a condition in which people experience symptoms of depression that are triggered by the change in seasons as the days get shorter. While this form of depression often improves in the spring and summer, it is important to talk with your health care provider if you feel you are experiencing these symptoms. Treatment is effective and may include light therapy, antidepressant medication, and/or talk therapy.
Avoid alcohol and drugs For people in recovery, the holiday season presents challenges that can trigger the use of alcohol and drugs. Having a plan for navigating social events and feelings of loneliness, can reduce the risk of substance use. For family and friends, it is important to check in on those who may be struggling with substance use over the holidays.
Know when to seek help If you feel that your mental health struggles are becoming overwhelming and difficult to handle, it is important to seek help and know that treatment is available. Below are free and confidential resources that can connect you with effective treatment and support.
SAMHSA’s National Helpline — 1-800-662-HELP (4357) – A confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.
FindSupport.gov — An online guide that helps people navigate through common questions when they are at the start of their journey to better behavioral health.
FindTreatment.gov — A confidential and anonymous source of information for persons seeking treatment facilities in the United States or U.S. Territories for substance use/addiction and/or mental health problems.
Veterans Crisis Line — Reach caring, qualified responders with the Department of Veterans Affairs. Many of them are Veterans themselves. Dial 988 then press 1.
There are days I wake up and feel odd, nervous, fidgety, and still empty. Nothing is inside me, my heart, or any feelable energy that motivates me. To find out what is wrong with me, I have to start at the beginning, asking myself questions I’d rather not know the answer to. But for the sake of honesty, I have to go there.
Where am I?
What am I doing here?
How did I get here?
Why do I hate to get up in the morning?
What is it that I hate so much about every single day for quite some time?
What do I see when I look in the mirror?
What do I think others see when they look at me?
Why am I alone?
Why am I treated the way I have been treated until recently?
What do I see in the future?
Why is my love not good enough?
Why am I not good enough?
Wouldn’t it be easier just to go, leave this world, and never come back?
Despite the fact that I’m normally a calm and quite controlled person, these questions are painful to ask and even more so to answer. I don’t generally tend to drama, but having emotions being stirred up that I carefully buried quite some time ago is not my imagination of Saturday morning entertainment.
So, how do I answer these questions, and do they lead me to where I want to go? Do the answers explain why I’m feeling down, worthless, or treated like I don’t matter?
Why do I feel that way, compared to others who are completely, absolutely, and utterly convinced they are at the height of their lives, careers, and love connections, and if not, it will be there any moment now. And in most cases, their positive ‘knowledge’ of improvement is just summoning what they want.
Let me answer a few of the questions without going into details of my personal life, just to go together where I want to go with this post today.
Why do I hate to get up in the morning? Because I feel like shit every single day, headaches, stomachaches, digestive problems, emotional pressure, and that’s how I’m going through the day – with a sweet smile, so nobody can see I’m close to tears.
What is it that I hate so much about every single day for quite some time? Because I love my job but hate the toxic work environment, the attempts to control and micromanage me, and the contempt and insult I have to face every day.
What do I see when I look in the mirror? Someone ugly, fat, and damaged; someone who’s not worth being loved; someone who isn’t pretty, beautiful, or even remotely presentable.
What do I think others see when they look at me? See above
Why am I alone? See above
Why am I treated the way I have been treated until recently? Apparently, I’m not good enough for someone to love me.
Why is my love not good enough? Because nobody ever takes the time and effort to look behind the ugly outside
Why am I not good enough? Because I’m obviously without any talent, skills, or intelligence.
Wouldn’t it be easier just to go, leave this world and spare others to look at me, be nice to me, or include me as a part of their life? – Most likely, it would, but I’ll do Hell and give up, I got that far!
Now, what does all that mean? Besides the fact that obviously, my anti-depressants do shit for me. How did I get to that point?
Research on over 30 expert websites online shows different triggers for depression. Some of them say it ‘can be’ rooted in bad parenting; others say it ‘might be’ genetic, blaming the hormones or some loose brain wiring. Whatever it finally is, nobody can tell.
Statistics show that around 9.5% of American adults age 18 or over are suffering from a depressive disorder each year, so one in 10 or 11 Americans who are chronically depressed suffer from bipolar disorder or dysthymia.
Talking to people with major depression made me realize a few things:
I’m lucky I’m not suffering from bipolar disorder or dysthymia. My phases of depression are shorter… and after a while swimming in my own misery, I tend to find the stairs of ‘the pool’ and climb out. Many others don’t have this ability, and I can thank my wonderful, humorous, funny, compassionate, and caring father for this skill. (Thank you, Dad!!)
Thinking positively might help many other people, but it doesn’t do a thing for me – obviously. Every single time I try to think positively, I’m disappointed.
I’m grateful to be here, to be what I am and what I made out of myself.
I will never again “sell myself below my value”
Being humble is one thing; being oblivious to my own values is an entirely different story.
I want to give people a chance to know me – but I don’t need to keep them around me if I don’t feel appreciated.
So, where does that take us? Probably to the discussion, whether I better contact a psychiatrist or continue stagnating in the pond of my own tears, so to speak…
Well, my personal experience showed me that talking with friends, loved ones, or a coach is more helpful to me than a psychiatrist who sets the alarm when the ‘hour’ is over. (Talking about feeling worthless)
So, when will my depression abate? Usually, when my situation changes. And I’m working on that, believe me… pretty hard I’m working on that!
There is one thing I’m grateful for, though… I don’t suffer from anxiety. (Unless you count stagefright, but that’s an entirely different story.)
Sometimes, it’s just good to have someone to talk to… and sometimes, it’s good to have someone to love. Sometimes…
When I wrote the title to this blog post, I had in mind to write about the emotional ingredients in tears, and how those are connected to crying.
Writers sometimes use the expression. ‘She cried.’ And I use the expression ‘she’ fully intentional, because crying in adults is still associated with women, rather than men.
I do prefer different expressions such as ‘she cried tears of joy’ or ‘she cried hot tears of embarrassment’, etc.
And then, suddenly, I started getting curious. What are tears actually made of and why do they exist? What is their purpose and what are they doing for us? I started my research and hit paydirt at Healthline.com. This website contains a myriad of interesting information.
According to the source, tears apparently contain quite a few very healthy ingredients, such as water, salt, fatty oils and over 1,500 different proteins. The electrolytes in tears include sodium, which makes our tears taste salty, bicarbonate, chloride, and potassium – and all that sounds extremely healthy. For your information, they’re completely natural, produced by our bodies and therefore we can let them dissolve on our skin, which gives it a slightly salty taste and a thin layer of crust.
Tears are made of three layers, the mucous layer, the aqueous layer, and the oily layer, and each of them has its own function. Healthline.com informs us about the functions of the layers, and also lets us know that tears have a similar consistency of saliva. (Well, I don’t know about you, but I personally thought that was pretty gross.)
However, all these facts don’t keep me from tearing up occasionally. Again, doing this, depends on different factors.
Reasons for tears are, either reflex tears, that are produced when the eyes are suddenly surprised by something, such as intensely bright light, smoke, or onions; or emotional tears, that we cry when we’re happy, sad, or have other intense emotional feelings. The third ‘set of tears’, called Basal tears are always there to keep the eyes lubricated and nourished, and to protect them from debris.
Also, there are a few fun facts about tears mentioned in this article, such as:
Men generally cry less than women
The older we get the less we cry
When newborns cry they don’t have tears yet because they’re lacrimal glands are not yet fully developed
Animals produce tears to lubricate or clean their eyes, in response to irritation or injury, but never out of emotions
Emotional tears are solely produced by humans
No matter how long or intensely you cry, you will never run out of tears.
Crocodile tears are only real, when you’re a crocodile
There are a few more facts, and I recommend to read the article.
Now, let me get back to my inspiration for this blog post.
Unless we’re writing a medical book about eye-injury, I suspect, tears in our character’s eyes will most likely be produced by strong emotional distress.
I would think, our possibilities for the characters to cry are:
Depression
Sadness such as heartache, grief, loss, etc.
Pain/Injury
Happiness/Joy/A moment of pure bliss
Embarrassment
Shame
Laughter
and
My personal favorite: Rage.
While all kinds of genres might mention sadness, pain, grief, happiness, laughter, and the other emotions, the last one is rarely ever described.
I then went online for another round of research. The search term ‘Tears of Rage’ ended up in the finding of a song, written by Bob Dylan. Not exactly what I was looking for.
I started a new search and ended up on questions that are asked on a regular basis. Can you cry out of anger? And the answer is: Yes. (Now, anger and rage belong to the same emotional family, therefore I’m not making a big fuss out of the slight change in wording).
VeryWellMind.com has the answer. It says there: “Crying is a common reaction to anger, since anger is often triggered by situations that hurt you. Crying can provide emotional release and help you understand your feelings better. However, crying in public or with people you’re not comfortable with can be embarrassing and frustrating.”
Crying is a physical manifestation of releasing emotions, which can include both anger and sadness.
— SABRINA ROMANOFF, PSYD
The website also offers a solution to the problem:
How to Stop Crying When You Get Mad
Some things you can do to stop crying when you get angry include deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, journaling, exercise, and mindfulness. These activities can help induce a relaxation response that can ease stress and may help you stop crying. Drinking cold water, spending a few moments outdoors, and taking a few moments to yourself can also help you calm down at the moment.
Why do I mention all this? When I initially typed the title of this post, ‘What Are Tears Made Of’? I was thinking of different emotions, less than the chemical, biological or nutritional ingredients.
Even strong characters with seemingly no emotional reaction on anything, might keep their triggers deep inside themselves, before letting anyone see their weakness or vulnerability. To me, information like this is helpful in creating a character, be it the protagonist, the antagonist, or a side character.
I have an antagonist who has the self-control of a polar bear (= none, whatsoever). He takes what he wants, he’s playing all kinds of games, he’s cunning, a notorious liar, a horrible creature, after all… but still… in a weak minute.
At times, tears might not be shed only for touching movies, heartaches, loss, and grief, but for feeling sorry for oneself. And that’s a ‘good’ reason, too – an emotional way of shedding tears – and entirely human.
There are days when I don’t feel like getting up… I don’t feel like going to work; I don’t feel like doing anything but just stare out the window and consider myself a lost cause.
Generally, even when I’m in a bad mood, writing normally helps me. I dive into the safety of my stories. When I’m depressed, not so much.
Some writers produce their best work when they’re suffering; Hemingway and Erich Maria Remarque were only two of them.
Despite my trying, I was never successful in writing anything useful when I suffered from depression. My dark mood mirrored within my stories, and I had to delete whatever I wrote during that time. (Maybe, except for a few really dark poems, but that’s an entirely different story.)
According to an article written by Daniela Ginta in May 2016 and published on ‘Healthline.com‘, there are 9 ways to motivate yourself when you’re depressed. I’m not going into her explanations in every single one of her ways. But I will reply with what I think about that kind of motivation… let’s find out:
1. Get out of bed and out of pajamas
Sheesh… I’m a writer… getting out of our pj’s is not a victory for us; that’s common daytime gear! What will I get for getting dressed and ready for the day – an award? A trophy? Didn’t think so!
2. Go for a walk
According to the author of this creation, exercise helps our body release endorphins – it’s even helpful for more severe cases of depression… I figure she was around 21 when she wrote that article – because when you reach a certain age, exercise reminds you that you have joints, muscles, and tendons that are the same age as you are – and they start hurting! So… when I’m depressed – do I need to be depressed AND in pain? Thanks, but no thanks!
Also, she says, another study recommends four weeks of aerobic training were improving symptoms of depression.
SURE!! I’m already depressed, and then I go and work out with women not even half my age who have nothing better to do than to show off their perfect bodies while I’m well aware mine starts falling apart?
3. Get your hands dirty to get a mood lift
Daniela also says another study (with mice) shows that some bacteria found in dirt may enhance the serotonin in our body, which should decrease the symptoms of depression. And other bacteria found in fermented food like yogurt can enhance moods and improve depression.
???
So, according to her, I should sit out in the garden, feel like a rodent and stuff my head with yogurt to feel better?
4. Don’t overschedule
Congratulate yourself for every task or goal you complete, no matter how small.
Congrats to myself – I showered.
Yippee, I poured myself a drink.
Yay, I made myself a sandwich.
Hooray, I went to the bathroom.
Oh – my – I listed too many tasks!!
5. Avoid negativity
Your brain digests whatever thoughts you create, so feed it positive ones.
I’m depressed, for God’s sake – I don’t have the energy or the spark for positive thoughts.
6. Stick to a routine
The sense of having accomplished daily tasks will promote a sense of well-being.
Or… you’re already depressed, and you belong to those people to whom too much routine is deadly? That might lead right into something you definitely shouldn’t even think about…
7. Socialize
Yeah, right. Being an HSP, having a group of people around making a big fuss, or talking among each other, instead of me, isn’t exactly fun and will definitely have the opposite effect.
8. Create a support network
*grin* – Yup… like the one time when I got a volunteer at my side who was supposed to check on me a couple times during the week – and the woman completely misunderstood her chores. She rang my doorbell at 6.30 am and stayed until 11.30 pm, glued to my side. I had to talk to her 24/7 and entertain her, and she asked me every two minutes how I was feeling. By day three, I was about half an inch away from cheerfully beating her to death with a flyswatter. On day four, I decided to turn off my doorbell and finally get some sleep. What did she do when I didn’t open the door or answer the phone by 7am? She called the police. The two cops were absolutely great! They kept her waiting outside while I made some coffee, asked them to sit down, and we chatted for over an hour. Then they had a talk with the volunteer lady – and around 12.30 pm, they picked me up for lunch – in the patrol car (They actually made sure I was sitting in the passenger front seat. LOL). During the entire week, they occasionally called me and invited me to have breakfast or, once, even dinner with them during their shift break – and these two cops did everything right while I had a really dark time. I will never forget them, these two amazing guys in blue!
9. Get enough sleep
Yeah – if you can! Sometimes your brain is working so hard on the problems that there’s no chance you can even fall asleep. Your employer generally doesn’t know you’re fighting for your life here – and you’re expected to stand there, fresh, relaxed, happy, and ready to go to work. Good Luck!
What Really Helps
Here are a few hints as to what really helps someone like me:
Be there for me as a friend, and just listen when I want to talk
Don’t ‘suffer’ for me or with me – it drives me up the walls – distracting me is a hundred times more helpful
Make me laugh
Ask me if I could do you a favor, and then have me bake something for you (You know you’ll love it – and you know I do too)
Please, be positive and cheerful – but don’t overdo it. It pisses me off…
And the one or other compliment would help boost my mood, too. (When you’re suffering from depression, the last thing you need to hear is, ‘OMG, you look old’)
So far, I haven’t found the boost to write on my books yet – but at least I’m writing blog posts and poems, and sometimes I write short stories here on ‘Writer’s Treasure Chest.’ I might get back where I continue writing on one of the books again.
It’s overcast and supposed to be raining. I hear faint thunder… but so far, no luck. I’d love to see that weather right now…
Lately I watched the movie ‘Dangerous Liaisons’, a film, published in 1988. I don’t want to go into lengthy explanations about why I watched the movie, what exactly the story plot is. It definitely is a story, plotted by bored noblesse, including love, ennui, blood and death.
The book was written by French Novelist Choderlos De Laclos and published 1782 under the title ‘Les Liaisons Dangereuses’. In the original stage play, the Vicomte de Valmont was played by Alan Rickman, which I would have loved to see. But the movie I’m talking about right now, has a very unusual main character, as a lover: John Malcovich. Together with Glen Close, as the Marquise de Merteuil, he busies himself with seducing women, ‘as a sport’ and betting on his reputation and success. The story starts when the Marquise de Merteuil insists her ‘old friend’ Vicomte de Valmont seduces the future bride of one of her former lovers… The Vicomte first rejects the challenge, but is soon drawn into the Marquise’s lies and scheming, and finds himself at the wrong end of the game. ‘On the way’ he seduces the virtuous Madame de Tourvel, falls in love with her, but treats her horribly to get rid of her. He’s too scared of commitment and runs. While being caught in the Marquises’ web the Vicomte dishonors a young girl and is finally challenged to a duel by the girl’s ‘fancy’, a young teacher, Chevalier Danceny. Meanwhile Madame de Tourvel succumbs to a fever and dies a lonely and miserable death… (Dangerous Liaisons 1988)
At this point I will not go any further in my movie description but be assured that this is a highly unusually casted movie with a phenomenal ending. I had to watch it a few times to watch it until I fell in love with not only the characters, but also the actors.
So, why the movie review? It took me a while to actually ask one particular question: What fever did Madame de Tourvel ‘succumb’ to? What fever would justify treatment with ‘bloodletting’ and ‘cupping’?
I was doing some research. Both treatment methods were used in the 19th century. The bloodletting was very common and could ‘cure’ almost anything from furuncles to gout. The cupping on the other hand, was mainly used in Asia and the Middle East and considered ‘alternative’ medical practice, and was later called ‘quackery’. (Right… because bloodletting cures everything… *slight sarcasm included*) However, apparently nothing helped poor Madame de Tourvel and she passed away, torn by grief, longing, guilt, and loss, according to the book and movie. However, there are medical explanations, too.
For once: Excessive ‘bloodletting’ was very common in these times. If a fragile person, already anemic, with low blood pressure, tending to seizures, was being blooded too often, it could easily result in death.
Or: also, a theory: Madame Tourvel just heard of Vicomte de Valmont’s death. The chance to ever seeing him again died with him. She was already hurt, insulted, half-crazed by grief, and other emotions, depressed to the excess. She might just have given up, the fever caused by an infection due to unclean medical utensils or excessive bloodletting.
Picture courtesy of Google.com
And now we’re getting to the secret… what does this highly romantic woman in a movie to do with a modern illness? A lot!
Nowadays she could have been diagnosed with the ‘Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy’, a condition which temporarily weakens the heart muscle, due to extreme stress, physically or emotionally. According to several medical magazines and websites, the symptoms are shortness of breath, chest pain, hot flashes, seizures… similar to a heart attack.
The symptoms are often checked by doctors the same way that heart attacks are, with EKG’s, blood tests, etc. The physical differences between the two resembling symptoms are simple. A heart attack most likely is caused by blockage, the Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy has no significant blockage, even though the symptom can temporarily enlarge the heart. Common complications of the Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy can be:
Backup of fluid into the lungs, called pulmonary edema.
Low blood pressure.
Irregular heartbeats, called arrhythmias.
Heart failure.
Blood clots in the heart.
The symptom rarely causes death, but it’s not unheard of.
But what causes it? – The answer is stress.
Sudden illness such as an asthma attack. for example
Major surgery.
Sudden broken bone.
Death of a loved one or other loss.
Strong argument.
There are possibilities to try and prevent the symptom
Sex. The Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy is more common in women than in men.
Age. Most people who have that syndrome are older than 50.
Mental health conditions. People who have or had anxiety or depression may have a higher risk of getting Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy
What do these two things have to do with each other now? Well, the Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy is also called ‘The Broken Heart Symptom’.
Considering all this information, I’m not particularly surprised Madame Tourvel passed away (or gave up life altogether).
Let’s say, a woman, a bit older than 50, who has a history of depression – and was quite played just recently by some guy – isn’t she basically the perfect victim of the ‘Broken Heart Syndrome’? – Hell, yes… ‘she’ is!
I’m quite tempted to write a highly romantic story, including Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy…. How about you?
Convinced that this was an excellent poem (even though it is quite dark,) I submitted it to the Poetry Festival Page, where its reading was performed by actress Becky Shrimpton, who did a fabulous job!
Or you can watch the performance on YouTube:
Let Your Soul Fly Free To Heaven – Poem By A. J. Alexander – reading by Becky Shrimpton
I published this poem the first time here on ‘Writer’s Treasure Chest’ in 2016. Since then, many things have changed… but some have stayed the same. I’m reposting this poem, not only because it’s probably one of the best I’ve ever written (I seem to write far better poems when I’m devastated, than when I’m happy), but also, because that’s how I currently feel…Some things just keep repeating themselves.
There’s a lot of darkness around me. But I have not the energy, nor the room, nor the quiet I need to write anything comparable at this point… So, let me sulk a bit in my misery… It seems to be my favorite thing to do right now.
We, humans, enjoy abbreviations. (Which reminds me: Why is ‘abbreviation’ such a long word?)
But humor aside: What is an HSP? People who have never been diagnosed as an HSP probably won’t know unless they are connected or related to an HSP.
An HSP is a Highly Sensitive Person.
I can see some people giggling right now. But I assure you, I’m not joking. Being an HSP has its disadvantages, and it can cause a person to quietly suffer a miserable life if the circumstances are against them. I’ll get back to that in a minute.
Let me describe to you what defines a Highly Sensitive Person:
A highly sensitive person (HSP) is a human being who reacts with an increased or ‘deeper’ central nervous system sensitivity to stimulating influences, be they physical, emotional, environmental, or social.
American psychologist Elaine Aron invented the term in the mid-1990s, continuously developing knowledge of the concept in the past few decades. According to Elaine Aron, HSPs show increased emotional sensitivity and stronger reactions to external and internal stimuli than the rest of the population.
Try to find out if you’re an HSP on Elaine Aron’s website, but definitely start with asking yourself these questions:
Are you easily overwhelmed by such things as bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics, or sirens nearby?
Do you get rattled when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time?
Do you make a point of avoiding violent movies and TV shows?
Do you need to withdraw during busy days, into bed or a darkened room or some other place where you can have privacy and relief from the situation?
Do you make it a high priority to arrange your life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations?
Do you notice or enjoy delicate or fine scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art?
Do you have a rich and complex inner life?
When you were a child, did your parents or teachers see you as sensitive or shy?
If you’re looking for other tests to take than this one, there are quite a few you can find, one of them here. But careful. Most of the currently available tests online are at least based on Elaine Aron’s findings and tests.
According to ‘Healthline.com’, HSP isn’t a disorder or a condition but rather a personality trait that’s also known as sensory-processing sensitivity (SPS).
Julie Fraga, a licensed psychologist in San Francisco, CA, describes her life as an HSP quite precisely within only one article.
One particular paragraph of hers caught my attention, and I moved it here for you to read:
3 things HSP people want you to know
We feel things deeply but may hide our emotions from others because we’ve learned to retreat.
We may appear uncomfortable in group situations, like work meetings or parties, because there’s too much stimulation, like loud noises. This doesn’t mean that we don’t value relationships.
When starting new relationships, like friendships or romantic partnerships, we may seek out reassurance because we’re hypersensitive to any perceived signs of rejection.
And after all this information, I’ll get back to what I said in one of the initial paragraphs: I’m getting back to the ‘miserable life’…. Consider you’re a person who feels deeply disturbed by loud noises, constant disturbance, interruption, demanded multitasking, demanded work within a field that you don’t like, surrounded by the noise of fans, voices, emotions of other people, no daylight, the entire day, no sunshine, warmth, comfort, or anything positive, day, by day, by day, no possibility of retreat, or peace and quiet for even one single minute of the day… You’re humiliated, insulted, and hurt by having to be sitting in an environment, out in the corridor, in front of the ‘bosses’ office, like a 50s stenotypist…
If you’re an HSP, strongly reacting to the influences around you, then this is your personal nightmare… And at this point, it’s mine.
Every single day, I get up to get tortured for another 8 hours… I can’t sleep anymore. For 16 to 18 hours a day, I’m fighting against the tears and a depression that even scares the living daylights out of me!
James Killian, LPC, Principal Therapist & Owner of Arcadian Counseling in New Haven, CT found a few things HSP people can do to make life easier for them:
See your sensitivity as a positive, not a negative
Remember: there is nothing wrong with you, and you are not alone.
As much as possible, avoid negative people, places, and situations
Set firm boundaries with people who take advantage of your compassion and empathy
Practice regular self-care through exercise, meditation, and mindfulness
Give yourself the same empathy and kindness as you do others
Nice list, James… what, if you can’t say anything and cannot avoid your current environment because you need the job – and the money?? Then you’re going on… further and further… day by day, with no perspective, no way out, until one day it might be too late? You pray and beg for help – and there is none… picture that….
And then… people are wondering why you’re fighting a deep, darkening, paralyzing, overarching depression…?
Writers often face physical and psychological challenges that many other professionals don’t experience.
Headaches
Vision
Obesity
Neck and back problems
Muscular disorders
Lack of vitamin D
Depression
Let’s have a look at the different health challenges.
Headaches and Vision problems are often caused by staring into an older computer monitor for hours without resting your head or eyes.
Recommended: Take a break every 30 to 60 minutes to give yourself a short rest, get up, walk around, open and close your eyes, and stretch your body; it is helpful in more than one way, you will see!
Obesity: Many writers claim their creativity flows mainly at nighttime, which isn’t surprising since many writers are working full-time jobs, and in the evening, their families demand their attention. They’ll use whatever time of the day they have left. Unfortunately, when they have peace to write, they barely move during the nighttime, but they’re tempted to keep their drinks and snacks as close as possible to avoid wasting time’ getting up and getting them. Both lead to extremely unhealthy eating habits and can cause weight gain and cardiac problems.
Recommended: Set a time limit for writing in the evening and on weekends. You can tell your family you need a few hours of quiet time for writing is nothing wrong with that. When you prepare for writing, there is nothing wrong with a drink or a snack, but pour yourself some water and prepare a healthy snack, such as berries or apple slices. (If possible, shortly before you go to bed, take out the dog for a quick walk around the block. It will relax you and make your move, which is healthy for your weight and the tension in your neck, back, and other muscles. – If you don’t have a dog, cats love going for walks, too!)
Wrong chairs often cause neck and back problems, incorrect heights of chairs, and ‘slouching’ on the chair. Getting up and moving around in regular 20-30 minute intervals is an innovative and healthy thing to do.
Recommended: Before you sit down to write, go outside, get your body to move, stretch your back and neck, and relax while walking. Take your dog for a walk. (Provided you have one, if not, cats love walks too, and so do children, husbands, wives, girls- and boyfriends, fiancés, cats, guinea pigs, and other pets.)
N.B. Getting up and moving around is also helping you with obesity, muscular disorders, and even the lack of vitamin D.
Depression is a horrible, invisible, hidden, but ongoing disease, and, if untreated, extremely dangerous to the patient.
Recommended: Get professional help! It is essential that you won’t let yourself fall any deeper into this hole as necessary. The earlier you get that taken care of, the better for you and everyone in your life. And I know what I’m talking about!
Writer's Treasure Chest 
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